All’s well that ends well.

I was about to begin this entry with the words, “This was my worst year ever.” Then I remembered.

I don’t live along Mayon Volcano. I haven’t set foot in Mindanao, much less Maguindanao. I didn’t get A(H1N1). My family was spared from the wrath of Ondoy. Though it can be difficult to find the silver lining when a young, promising teacher dies, or an estranged uncle passes away, I just pinch myself – I am still here. The cynic in me would quip that nothing really happened in 2009. I disagree. I look back at times that were really good and the following come to mind.

20 February 2009

Sigaw! was AKSIS’s biggest project yet and I am pleased with how it turned out. It wasn’t perfect, of course. We sort of missed our targets to record the winning song (though that can still change) and shop the contest to radio stations for sponsorships and what not, but it was just a huge thing to get our feet wet and feel that this is indeed possible. I am deeply hoping for a sequel of sorts, and I am confident my team this year can cobble something together.

Polarity, 13 March 2009

Mt. Pinatubo, 15 March 2009

I say this now to make it official: School Year 2008 to 2009 was my best school year so far. This is not to diminish all the awesome things I’ve done and incredible people and students I’ve worked with in the past — like Pisay Meets World and the founding of AKSIS in 2007 — but last school year I was given the biggest assignment I’ve had yet.

I really loved every single moment of being the Batch Adviser to 2011. It was just such a different challenge that required me to dig deep and bring out skills I’ve always had but never got to utilize fully. I am thankful for the people I’ve met and the new partnerships I’ve formed. I am just so glad for the opportunity, and given the chance I would have loved to continue on to Third Year and continue serving Batch 2011 as their Adviser, or take in a new Batch, 2012, under my wing. Either would have been excellent, but alas, it was not meant to be. Other teachers deserve their big moments too, and this one was it for me.

As we triumphantly stood overlooking the crater of Mt. Pinatubo, I said, “It couldn’t get any better than this.” Indeed.

7 to 15 November 2009

And then there was India. My first encounter with the country is both familiar and strange. Familiar for I have read and learned so much about the country prior to my trip, but strange because nothing can quite prepare you for India. However, this country begs a sequel and a series of sequels. Our trip was relatively contained, and I wasn’t able to soak in as much of the locality as I hoped.

But the little I did absorb is already tremendously rich, and hence my respect and curiosity for the country has only increased. I will forever remember the sweet hospitality of Aakriti and Tushar, and the hilarity that ensued between Jeff, Terence, and I. It was my privilege learning about education from Debashis Chatterjee, and I am now on a quest to make educationist a real word and profession here in the Philippines.

So why the initial pessimism?

Let me try to articulate why I haven’t been writing as much anymore.

Every time I stare at my computer screen, I ask myself, “Will these words matter?”

Is there really sense in writing down how my day went, or what I really think about school policies, or what new books I got. Will any of that matter?

Perhaps, to one or two individuals it will. Or when I write something controversial it will matter to a whole lot for about two seconds, then it’s back to your regularly scheduled programming.

But does it matter to me?

For lately I’ve been feeling a wider gap between the things I say and the things I do. More and more, I feel myself not being able to live up to the standard I’ve set out for me, and that is to always speak the truth and to be honest in all things I do.

I am not saying that I’ve become a liar, a cheat, or a hack. Far from it.

I simply say this — that I speak of change, yet writing on this blog reminds me of how little things change.

I decry school policies and yet in describing how the system has slighted me, I realize how little I’ve really done. I comment on politics and conclude how lousy our government is while I remain seated, distant, and insulated from the political process.

I’ve always wanted more for myself. And now, after having written on this blog for the better part of the last two years, I now want more from myself.

Not just words anymore.

That is why last school year was so precious to me. For the first time in my adult professional life, there was no gap between words and action, ideas and execution. I believed that I served as Batch Adviser not for myself but for my students, and is so doing I put my career on the line. It worked. It paid off. We triumphed.

What I want more for myself are more moments like that. No, I am not demanding that I become Batch Adviser right here, right now. All I ask is that opportunity to realize those bigger things I’ve always wanted for myself, and if the system will not provide then it falls on me to make my own path.

This is how I’ve always been, I remind myself now. I used to speak about how I don’t believe in a destiny given to me, but that a man does everything he can until his destiny is revealed. (That I picked up from The Last Samurai, if you remember.)

And here’s another favorite from Batman Begins:

“It’s not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me.”

But it’s been a while. Let’s update ourselves with something from The Dark Knight.

“You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.”

I’ve been writing less because I began to see myself as the villain in my own story. I’ve placed so much faith in me that when things failed to turn my way, I slipped into apathy and indifference. I became the person I never wanted to be. But perhaps, I should remind myself how in my teaching, I believe in others so easily. If there is one sphere of my life where I place complete faith and trust in others, it would be in my students. (And this is probably why teaching is so important to me.) And yet, if the pictures above would attest, my most triumphant moments were never alone. Something to think about, Martin.

That being said, I still feel ambivalent about continuing to write here. This post has been wonderful; allowing myself more time to think and write more honestly about the past year has helped neutralize the cynicism I’ve felt about the moments that didn’t go too well. If only for catharsis, I can still write and this blog will still be here.

But I feel that everything I write — especially here on the Internet — only glimpses at “who I am underneath.” I am like Clark Kent, ripping open his shirt, and claiming to the world, “I am Superman!” but without the actual ability to fly, bend steel, and shoot fire from his eyes. Or can’t he?

For it is what I do next that will define me.

It is what we do that does.

Happy New Year to all!

Learn something you want to learn today! Visit iTunes U.

I am deeply impressed by iTunes U.

I cyclically grow tired of listening to music (gasp!) so this has given my iPod a second life.

There is something eerily sublime about listening to Quentin Skinner’s lecture on What is Freedom? while working my way through Metro Manila traffic.

Last night while waiting for a concert to begin I listened to a lecture on how to prepare the mind to favor chances. It took the old adage, “Chance favors the prepared mind” to whole new heights and was rife with examples you have to hear to believe.

And last Friday just before my first class, I listened to an inspiring and provocative talk by Denise Clark on “how we are creating a generation of stressed-out, materialistic, and miseducated students.” It was so good that it almost made me send my class off on a free period.

iTunes U is compatible with the way I learn which is highly contextual. I learn in the pursuit of answers to practical questions and problems I encounter in my everyday life. A lot of what I know now of Asian history was built while trying to add value to an aging syllabus and improving the way I handle questions in class. Moreover, I seek out insights into teaching itself and appreciate it when I encounter speakers who can add to what I know about today’s youth and how they interact with technology, and how we teachers can prepare our students for the knowledge economy.

I highly recommend iTunes U to everyone, especially if you have a genuine love of learning that requires no external force to get you going.

You don’t even need an iPod; just a computer with iTunes on it and a healthy Internet connection. I suggest you give it a try and learn something you really want to learn today!

Tomorrow, my classes have their first mock trial in a series of three. The topic is the Sepoy rebellion and to prime myself I am listening to a lecture by Stanford historian David Abernathy on the consolidation of British power in India from the mid-18th century onwards. I don’t even have to open a book; I just enjoy the drive to work.

Why I supported Martial Law at first — and now question it

In matters of national security, I find it prudent to defer to people who know better than me. I am the farthest from a military man, and so I harbor no pretense of telling them what to do.

I understand how the massacre in Maguindanao created a crisis of epic proportions. But in my opinion it went beyond the morality tale that the media has simplified it into — irresponsibly, if I may add — and is now more so a political crisis for the current administration who has been in bed for far too long with these men, and a security crisis where there exists a clear and present danger for violence to break out and disrupt the province in a profound, cataclysmic way.

The only analysis point I would like to offer everyone is this — the situation is by no means a mere case of ‘law enforcement’. The Ampatuans are the law in Maguindanao. Bringing these murderers (say that word with all the righteous indignation you can muster!) to justice was never going to be simple. Last week I read a report of the beleaguered governor’s private army (read: army) surrounding him to protect him from unwarranted arrest. Then I breathed a sigh of relief that the President has declared Martial Law. For me it was a far more gentler alternative to all-out civil war. (Although now it seems like a mere prelude to it.)

A recent report from ABS-CBN’s “Boto-Patrollers” has dug up a precious quote: ““Dalawa lang ang puwedeng pagpilian ng mga kritiko: martial law ng mga Ampatuan o martial law ng gobyerno.” (“The critics have only two choices: martial law under the Ampatuan or martial law under the government.”) Sad when you think about it.

I’m also the farthest from a supporter of Madame President for the simple reason that she has never really resonated with me. However, I am willing to give her the benefit of the doubt that despite all the hanky-panky she has done in the past, she would not declare Martial Law recklessly given our sordid history with the term and with the whole world watching. MLQ3 is right; it is the last post-EDSA taboo she had left to break.

I understand all the conspiracies and doomsday scenarios. However, I am not yet in a position to take them seriously. I am still convinced (and hopeful) that the elections next year will push through no matter what. With the way the political winds are blowing through the world now (Change! Yes, we can!), an unpopular president such as PGMA simply cannot afford to curtail democracy even further by preempting its most sacred ritual. (The leaders of Iran tried to; now their downfall is a matter of time.) Even I, most probably, will be up in arms.

Wait, bad pun.

However, things have changed. After reading Madame President’s report to Congress, I am now skeptical.

Not judging the capability or expertise of our military men and reacting solely to the document that details the premises our President have used to declare Martial Law in Maguindanao, I find the case to be flimsy, speculative, and weak.

The report offers details not too different from what we’ve already seen reported in the media. The only place where we can see the logic (if you can call it that) they used to justify that a rebellion was in the offing is in the 20th of 20 pages, written in a manner that seemingly desperately tries to form a link between their premises and their aims.

Simply, their case is this: a massacre has been committed, the Ampatuans have been implicated, and a cache of weapons and false vehicles have been found. Ergo, a rebellion is in the offing. Yes, they allude to movement of armed and lawless men, and the shutdown of government. But that’s it. No further details. I would have wanted to see more names, details, and flash points.

The last time the world turned on a premise this flimsy was when a country (which we shall not name) justified their attack on Iraq by linking Saddam Hussein with Osama bin Laden.

That said, our government has just declared Martial Law on the basis of non sequitur — at least that is the impression I get from reading the President’s report.

I demand greater transparency. Accountability. I want our President to explain her case not to Congress but to the people. I don’t expect her to resonate with me but I’d appreciate her willingness to try. Otherwise, my voice will join the chorus of those who demand not just that the Supreme Court revokes Martial Law, but that the President steps down.

Because if Martial Law will be imposed on loose sand such as this, then it will be unsustainable.

If she declared it to project an aura of state control and power, she has done so in the short-term but no farther than that. The ejection of the Ampatuan from Maguindanao will leave open a power vacuum which — under Martial Law — government forces will continue to occupy. In the near-term they will have to weed out the armed elements loyal to the Ampatuan and win back civilians who have benefited from their dynastic hegemony. In the long-term they will have to establish institutions that can stand on their own and facilitate a clean transfer of power.

I feel that this will be unsustainable since warlord enclaves exist and flourish in different parts of the Philippines. Martial Law is political poison, and as a tool it cannot become our government’s defining strategy in ousting these warlords and stabilizing regions. We don’t have the ample government resources to stage such a campaign — isn’t that why they went to bed with these warlords in the first place?

The way out of this political impasse is a complicated one, and I would love to share my thoughts in a future entry. Suffice to say, reliance on warlords can be broken by genuine socio-economic development that builds healthy societies from the ground up. But that is a democratic project that will require time, patience, and a virtuous leader who can get things done.

Yet insofar as the declaration of Martial Law goes, I now have serious questions about it. While I am not a big fan of digging up old fears, I am an advocate of being cautious for the future.

PGMA’s Report to Congress on Martial Law in Maguindanao

Saying everything and nothing at the same time

In his most recent column, Manuel Quezon III (MLQ3), debunks the enthusiasm of some on the Teodoro camp by saying that the ‘mock polls’ conducted through Facebook are precisely that — mock.

He follows an absurd double standard by discrediting the ‘trending’ of the mock poll and suggesting that the number of ‘fans’, ‘followers’, and ‘multiply connections’ are more accurate indices of support. He writes, “Another way to measure commitment to the candidates is by means of Twitter, where people can follow people and candidates they like” (emphasis mine).

I hope he was being sarcastic.

I find no difference between either the mock poll results or the social network connections that these candidates have. Both are phony.

But if we insist, here are some considerations that have to be made in “interpreting” membership in these social networks.

One — economic class. It has been well documented that bulk of Internet users belong to the middle class and higher. I am not surprised by the poor showing of Estrada and Villar in Facebook — or Villar’s stronger showing in Friendster (which undoubtedly has a larger mass base, and which the upper classes have long abandoned for Facebook). Villar’s earlier campaign also included a reach out to Multiply.

Second — longer-term Internet trends. The death of Cory Aquino led to a massive surge in interest in the Aquinos, the color yellow, and Bench T-shirts. There is no doubt that Noynoy Aquino rode this surge, thus giving him a massive media mileage that trumped even the well-moneyed Villar.

Thus the question I want to raise to MLQ3 is this: How much time did Noynoy’s groups have to gestate and grow vis-a-vis the group of a lesser known candidate like Teodoro? How many members in these groups — particularly the 109,349-strong fan page of his — joined in August? September? October? November? Moreover, are these groups truly exclusive of each other? For instance, I joined Noynoy’s last September then Teodoro’s just last night, and I am sure I am not the only one. (I think I’m part of Risa Hontiveros’s too, but not for political reasons.)

Third — the very composition of the groups. Most of my students with a Facebook account have joined the fan groups of at least two candidates — and none of them are of voting age this coming election. Moreover, let’s not pretend we don’t know how these groups work. We know very well how membership in them can be due to fads, image, or peer influence. Following someone on Twitter is not always an act of commitment (which, I take MLQ3 to mean the give-and-take citizen kind of commitment he has always advocated for). Do we have the numbers on how many of this really joined out of conviction and principle? Does that even matter?

For if one will assert that the numbers speak for themselves, or that there are simply too many members in Noynoy’s group to question its legitimacy, then we can use the same flimsy logic to assert that the trends in the Facebook “survey” clearly show a steady rise in Teodoro’s numbers — after all who can question 12% to 63%!

My point is, all of these are unscientific. Let us not over-inflate the importance of these Internet tools. Authentic web platforms and tools can be developed to measure public opinion of course — and I believe that they should — but none of these are that yet. None of these really tell us anything despite the attempt of partisans on both sides to read the tea leaves.

I agree, MLQ3, that there is no Facebook survey, that the results of that Election2010 can be seriously misrepresentative of the true pulse of the people, and that any attempt to draw conclusions from them is severely irresponsible.

But when you pointed out the disparities in Facebook, Twitter, Friendster, and Multiply connections, I was left wondering why you didn’t go into discussing the inconsistencies of their membership or why, despite your command of the Internet and the Philippine blogosphere, you took their numbers at face value. That struck me as a tad irresponsible too.

The lost irony — Efren Penaflorida and PGMA

When Madame President filed her COC to run for Congresswoman of Pampanga, the irony must have been lost on her. Just last week she honored Efren Penaflorida, a man whose modest outreach to uneducated and marginalized youth was recognized by the world over. Sure, the CNN Hero award is no Nobel Peace Prize. Sure, it was conferred by him through populist voting via the Internet.

But by conferring unto Efren the Order of Lakandula, Madame President has elevated Efren’s prize into something more. According to EO236 (The Honors Code of the Philippines) –

The Order of Lakandula is conferred upon a Filipino or foreign citizen:

a. who has demonstrated by his life and deeds a dedication to the welfare of society;

b. whose life is worthy of emulation by the Filipino people;

c. for deeds worthy of particular recognition, including suffering materially for the preservation and defense of the democratic way of life and of the territorial integrity of the Republic of the Philippines, for devoting his life to the peaceful resolution of conflict, or for demonstrating an outstanding dedication to the fostering of mutual understanding, cultural exchange, justice and dignified relations among individuals; or

d. for acts that have been traditionally recognized by the institution of presidential awards, including meritorious political and civic service.

The Order of Lakandula elevates Efren’s prize from an example to a standard. That is the very essence of honoring distinguished achievement and patriotic service. These very acts, in the words of EO236, “enhance the prestige of a nation.”

The irony is that while Madame President claims to run for Congresswoman once again for the sake of public service — it runs in her DNA, she says — she should be the first to know that public service isn’t monopolized by public office.

I doubt anyone will rush to confer the Order of Lakandula on PGMA for pursuing another government post after a long, storied and troubled affair with the Presidency of the Philippines. It’s ignoble at the least.

She could go into something else if her heart was true. Start a foundation. A school. Go back to teaching economics. The least she could do is spare the country of the divisive and polarizing debates her candidacy has already brought.

The irony is that she has elevated Efren’s example into a standard she herself may never meet; some may say had already failed to meet. And there is a wide chasm between Efren’s fifteen minutes of fame and Madame President’s nine years in office — only one enhanced the prestige of the nation.

School terminologies — What teachers think

I saw this post in Facebook and found it amusing –

SCHOOL TERMINOLOGIES

• ABSENT >> Protesting a lousy teacher.
• ALLOWANCE >> The hidden force that motivates a student to go to school.
• BALLPEN >> Bestseller of the bookstore.
• BONUS >> The key to passing the exam.
• I. D. >> Alternative ruler in drawing straight lines
• LATE >> Happens when the teacher arrives earlier than expected
• STUDYING >> Causes sleepiness faster than a sleeping pill.
• UNIFORM >> Where you wipe your wet hands after going to the C.R.
• CLINIC >> A place in the school where there are many best actors & actresses
• ERASER >> Throwable weapon of an angry teacher.
• TOMORROW >> Deadline!

But it’s from the students’ perspective. Here is my version for teachers –

SCHOOL TERMINOLOGIES (Teacher version)

• ABSENT – I can take one without asking for an excuse letter from my parents. HA!
• 1st PAY DAY – I do this for the love.
• 2nd PAY DAY – …I need a new job.
• CHALK – The smaller they get, the more accurate your throw becomes.
• BONUS –  Additional items so they pass a test designed to fail them otherwise.
• LATE – Let’s arrive a minute before the free cut (usually 10 minutes) just to mess with their minds.
• STUDYING – Something we did more of back when WE were students.
• UNIFORM – This is a violation of my personal freedom.
• CLINIC – A place to SLEEEEP.
• ERASER – Best used after erasing a full board. Splash damage.
• TOMORROW – Ah. THEM again.

And here’s more. Maybe someone can make the student version of these:

CLASS SUSPENSION – Whee. Time to check papers.

HOLIDAY –  …More time to check papers.

HOMEWORK – Why do I even bother?

WIKIPEDIA – I wish we had this when I was a student. We didn’t. So why should they?

GRADUATION DAY – Three more hours before summer vacation! Woohoo!

There can be more of course. Have fun!